I don’t know why people are so cold toward me. I think I have always considered others even when there were problems with communication. I have always tried to communicate, anyhow. People I’ve met and strangers alike go out of their way to ignore me, some even rudely. The epicenter is my home. I haven’t got a single neighbor I could consider a friend, even after almost two decades of living here. I haven’t got any friends anywhere. I don’t think I’m being too demanding that I want someone to make plans with me. I’m tired of being excluded and avoided. Apparently more than a few people enjoy stalking me, only to deter others from wanting to connect. I don’t know why I’m treated this way, isolated and left out, but constantly watched… I only sound crazy when I talk about the eavesdroppers and the watchers, but it’s damn near public knowledge. I’m tired of it all – the license plates and crypto speak, the gossips and the thieves. I ask everyone, how are you today? I never hear it. I’ve asked the right questions to every level of public law and been denied answers. I’ve made my situation public and reached out for help. I’m winning, because I stand on self respect. But I’ll count in years the last time I got a hug at this rate. It may be an auto parts store, a grocery store, or a car stopped in my blind spot because the driver doesn’t want to make eye contact. It doesn’t matter if it’s an unanswered note an email, or a post like this. I know I deserve warmth. Besides the lack of sex and affection, I’m dealing with what may have happened to my mother and why nobody was there for me when my father passed – and I have no one there for me, because of the sociopathic beliefs of the groundskeeper, or the malicious intent of the drug addict who’s always yelling at me and making videos, or was it the FBI, DHS, or the Department of Mental Health? It doesn’t matter. I don’t deserve the coldness.