That must be you flying around on Saturday’s, stalking me from the air. You were the woman who wanted me to punch a punching bag in a thrift store in Eugene for you. That would be you who once took over a restaurant in Newport just to have a conversation with your phone. You’ve followed me in cars, too, and I think it must be you with the yellow boat from years ago. Did you have something to do with the yellow kayak from a more recent year? And was it you in the black car the other day flashing me sign language in my rear view? F.U.N. If so, you turned off too fast. But you’ve been stalking me for years, and I have gone to extreme lengths to make myself available. There is no way of making myself unavailable, anyway. I have several letters started to my mother with things like, you don’t understand what it’s like living here… I’m on constant watch, my activities closely monitored, and my conversations are eavesdropped on. The same people go out of their way to keep me from having any personal relationships, especially sexual ones. And they do what they can to deprive me of holidays, even my own Birthday. You must be aware you’re part of this as you keep planning Christmas without me and then you make me watch? Were you the one who left a piece of my mother’s pineapple upside down cake and some tea bags on the back porch one holiday? You must be the woman in Santa Clara who tried to help my family to manipulate me, and helped yourself to land and money? Are you aware of the problems I have here with the Jehovah’s Witnesses? You’re part of that, you know. And you must know the problem is not just stalking and invasions of privacy but the lies that are told. Complaints like this will be characterized as paranoia. If I say anything in my home when nobody else is here, or if I’m seen thinking out loud I’m accused of talking to spirits. Things are taken completely out of context and twisted into something ill. There’s a bizarre amount of effort to ‘plant seeds’ psychologically and control my social life. These people are literally trying to police my thoughts. It’s like living on house arrest. Both of my neighbors are completely untrustworthy, too. They seem to know personal information about me, but they only pay attention to my material belongings while being terribly irresponsible with their own. I don’t have any friends. The trash man is the leader of the cult that runs things here. I think the last time I complained about the violations of privacy and harassment, he turned it into a sermon about me. He shows every sign of being a sociopath with a religious obsession as well as being paranoid and delusional. But because the voices he hears in his head he associates with Jesus, he considers himself holy and believes his purpose on this earth is to ‘save’ those who don’t see him as The Holy Saviour. It’s self-capitulating by both validating a false ego and fueling a need for power through fear mongering and demeaning others, using the Bible as an excuse. Individuality and personal expression are not respected, and these people will not take responsibility for their actions as individuals, legally. To him and his followers, being an author, an artist, or a musician is the equivalent of evil. And because I don’t want to be part of their cult, I must be insane. I’m being gaslighted. And you, Leticia, have not made the situation better by taking advantage of it. I’m not your mental patient, nor have I ever been. Is it true you based a study on me? Thanks. The Jehovah’s Witnesses have taken full advantage of that, ironic because they prompted it to begin with. There’s no denying that you already know about this because you were here. You have been in contact with family and friends, even childhood friends and old relationships, even my neighbors – but you can’t call me on the phone? send a text? or come visit me at home? or send an email? STOP STALKING ME!!! It’s a lifelong dream to fly and you obviously make plans to come observe me, but you won’t make plans with me? I’m not going to hang out at the any of the little airports waiting for you, not even the landing strip on 22 – not anymore. I have waited for you and made myself available for many, many years… and you have taken one man after another up into the sky with you, even in Mexico. You know where I live and I’m pretty sure you’ve got my number. I’m tired of the games. You get a genuine thumbs up to your success, even if it is with my family’s money. I’m not under the impression that you’re my friend or that you ever loved me. I think you exploited me, and maybe you feel a little guilty but I don’t think you care about me. There has been nothing stopping you from talking to me about my well being, nothing stopping you from giving me a hug. I have pleaded with you for a one on one, heart to heart, eye to eye conversation. I’ve asked for answers that I have every right to legally and morally. You threw me to the wolves. I’m sure you didn’t expect me to succeed, anyway. But I’m not here to help further your career, nor am I here for your convenience or your entertainment. I’m pretty tired of dealing with your friends, too. Why are they all involved with drugs and/or law enforcement? Maybe you should all go back to California if cocaine is more important to you than people. I’m not the only one tired of the corruption. The eavesdropping and the lies fund drug addicts and thieves. Please, don’t be part of the problem. If you don’t want to communicate openly and honestly, just go away and leave me alone. I’m as isolated as I’ve ever been and I’d rather not think about who you’re with and how much fun you’re having. For me, it’s just work and paying off debt, still clinging to lifelong dreams of property and travel. And you have cost me a lot.