skysurfer.media

2003May06 (Poem+)


2003May06 (Poem+)
I am in love. Or in light. There is a visible – blaringly visible – delicate glow that permeates all that there is. Lightening strikes a spiral ripple in this lake of emotion; there is the same wellspring at the center of our lives; the same spark or glimmer – am I insane? Are my dreams really coming true? – And yet I know her, she’s changeable and likely to turn against herself. She cares about me, more than anyone has before, but what will happen? There are so many variables (and so many people). I don’t worry about others coming between us – no one knows us, or understands us, enough. I worry about her judgment, though she has demonstrated more ability than I have to show. I wonder how much of a chance we are taking on each other, or if this is as fateful as it seems. Or is it fateful? At times (such as today) I find myself in the midst of the wildest coincidence, strange even for synchronistic things.
[next page]
Such a perfect day on which I dine.
A perfect woman to stimulate my palate
Like a painter I sense the mood of the hue
Even as you remind me
Of that ever important substance called light
You drive by, a flash of your presence
Enough I hope to capture this thought
Even after it has begun.
Native son shadows the violinist
And my hunger strengthens
Who cares where my next meal comes from!!!
This one is on it’s way!

There is a certain façade that is expected of others, big or small we prepare for it; and they, us. You see, as we look at each other we put a certain distance between ourselves. That, in turn, makes us feel separated – like we’re in a glass jar because there’s this invisible wall between us and every-body-else… and we want more, so, we look for that someone who we can connect to and develop our ability to connect to all and then one day… one day, I meet this woman who I felt no wall with our touch – we touched and it was free.
[next page]
What will they all think of me! We all know the truth is no one is likely to understand. She is strange (everyone knows that) but I might just scare the hell out of them. People are frightened by things that move quickly like lightening – although, the chance of being hit by lightening in far less than that of contracting a terminal illness. – Nevertheless, poelpe spook more easily than sheep (and herd as well) and like my friend says “though we walk on the backs of the ewes as dogs, we must never forget we are part of the flock”. Heaven bring me as much. I am now haling.
[next page, evening?]
Is my heart so malleable, tenderized and softened, that it now forms to every movement her spirit makes? And where did she come from? I didn’t think that people like her could be in this world. She is the most magnificent soul a person could hope to shere with her presence. Her eyes are light. I feel her with the core of my being. And I need to touch her. I am still so afraid of losing, yet this is the greatest unknown connection to someone I’ve made ever. I’ve met
[cut off]

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